There is a special tang, that most of the Jewish jokes share. They are really funny and really sad, or sometimes shocking at the same time. It is truly a situation where if you will not laugh – you will cry, or reach for the nearest blunt instrument. It is the kind of humor we called “black” in Russia.
So here is the joke :
Altmann and his secretary were sitting in a coffeehouse in Berlin in 1935. “Herr Altman”, said his secretary. “I notice you’re reading Der Shturmer! I can’t understand why you’re carrying a Nazi Libel sheet. Are you some kind of masochist, or, G-d forbid a self-hating Jew?”
“On the contrary, Frau Epstein. When I used to read Jewish papers, all I learned about were pogroms, riots in Palestine, and assimilation in America. But now that I read Der Shturmer, I see so much more: that the Jews control all the banks, that we dominate in the arts, and that we’re on the verge of taking over the entire world. You know – it makes me feel a whole lot better.”
As they say in Russia, “in every joke there is a part of the joke”.
Usually I avoid reading the newspapers. Call me an ostrich – I am quite comfy with my head stuck in the sand. Today, while waiting in line for the check-out I picked up a Jewish newspaper – The Algemeiner.
Well, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Here are the headlines from the front page:
Auschwitz Sign Stolen for “Mad Collector”
Apparently a group of thugs stole, to order a famous sign from the gates of the Auschwitz Concentration Camp – now museum.
More than one million people, mostly Jews, died in the gas chambers or from starvation and disease while performing forced labor at Auschwitz. This camp became the world’s biggest Jewish cemetery. The sign said “Arbeit Macht Frei” – “Work makes you free”.
It has been found.
British Court Issued Warrant for Former Israeli Minister
Ridiculously, for “war crimes committed by Israeli troops in Gaza”. Talk about black humor.
Demjanjuk Witness Tells of Deportation
About a trial of the real war criminal, who is charged with 27,900 counts of accessory to murder for his activities as a guard at Sobibor Concentration Camp, for which he volunteered as an SS Guard. His lawyer says that Demjanjuk is a “victim of an international judicial plot”.
Netanyahu: “I Face Dilemma of Freeing Schalit vs. Defending Israelis”
I think this one is self-explanatory.
Moldovan Jews Undeterred by Smashed Menorah.
Apparently a Russian Orthodox priest has led his congregation in demolishing a traditional Hanukkah Candelabrum – menorah, that was put up in the capitol of Moldova – Chisinau. The mob was armed with metal bars and hammers. While the “faithful” were destroying the 5′ tall bronze candelabrum the crowd held signs, chanted anti-Semitic slogans and clarified that they would not allow Jews “to control Moldova”.
Surprise, surprise, there is no official reaction from either the government or the church.
As a crowning touch there is a photo of President Obama shaking hands with Kaddafi. Is there a terrorist left with whom our illustrious president has not met yet?
All this is just the front page. Now I need a glass of wine and something cheerier to read. Anyone has a fresh issue of Palestinian News?